I am a bartender and so I do a lot of functions. I see all kinds of people - asian, black, latin, white. All have their characteristics. White people drink “Bud Lite”. Hispanic people want Cas Amigos or Don Julio tequila. Black people want Hennessy and Red Bull. These patterns are so common that we keep rows of Hennessy and Don Julio and Patron. No one ever wants Cuervo even though it’s half the price. No one drinks whiskey anymore even though we have an entire shelf of nothing but various whiskeys and bourbon. The only exception is Jack Daniels. The whiskey is covered with dust, literally.
Black people tip unevenly, despite the stereotype of them not tipping. Some over tip. Some don’t tip at all. Some do it the same as every other race/people - they shrug and throw a dollar in the jar. It is true they don’t tip as well as White people but they do tip - and often well. And one thing is true of all races - they drunker they get the better they tip.
But that is one thing I don’t like about Black people - they are almost always ready to fight for any or no reason. And that gets much worse as they get drunker. They don’t even care if they are wearing an expensive suit. They will thrown down right there. And as a White guy I can say this without any hestitation - they like the suckiest, raunchiest music at the highest volume. Last night I listened to a song at a baby shower where there were lots of children where the chorus - at full volume - was “fuck her in the ass, fuck her in the ass, fuck her in the ass.” I had to put down the drink I was making and blanch in shame for the women and children - and no one missed a beat. It meant nothing to them. After the party is over, my ears are ringing from that terrible music. Some of the other bartenders refuse to work those functions just because of the music and volume. I know - I am old and out of touch.
Have you ever had a bad gut feeling about someone and it was right?
So these are my racist observations from running functions for seven years. Take from it what you will.
I see the good and bad of all races at these ridiculous functions - baby showere, engagement parties, 15 year birthdays for Spanish girls where they are dressed up like a princess with a crown and long white gloves. You see lots of things.
Black women have a push-pull with parties. They tend to overdress but many of the women bought their expensive gown five years ago and put on 50 pounds and still squeeze into it. I think they think they still look good. They don’t. More than any other race, Black women have no problem exposing nipples at fancy parties as style. Men where tuxedoes with sneakers and backward hats. White people wear suits and clothes like it’s rare to dress up. Hispanic people are interested in flamboyant displays of clothing and bodies.
Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support.
I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized.
he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that.
he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened.
he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence.
i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me
i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction.
after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly.
things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it.
we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe …
our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far?
this has upset me so much its hard to even function.
At white people parties, such as graduations, the parents get shitfaced and the kids, who never try to sneak booze from the bar, are embarrassed and have to drive them home. White people by and large tips the best.
I can say this: every race has beautiful people, beautiful women. But no one - and I mean no one - has beautiful women like some of the Black women I have seen at these functions. The thing I like most about Black people is the stunning black women of all ages who know style, poise and how their looks affect men. I am an old, fat, bald, white bartender wearing a VFW shirt…. and they will flirt and bat eyes at me as if I am desirable. And they never get free drinks from me, though they might get better service. The parties with Black people are the only ones where I find lace or other kinds of panties on the floor under the tables after the party. I can’t even understand why.
